The Un-American (and Un-Christian?) Way

Today I had a decidedly un-American experience. A relative stranger asked me for help. Not a creepy stranger, not a weird favor, just needed a ride to the VW dealership several blocks down. I was headed in exactly that direction and was so shocked that I said yes; I’m glad I did it.  I had to ask him where he was from, and he mentioned he had only been in the U.S. for about fifteen years; he was born and raised in India. Of course, I already knew he was a foreigner– true Americans observe a strict taboo against helping each other.

As I drove myself home I started thinking about the way that a small group (maybe a large group, I don’t know) of people at my church want to bar “neighborhood” people from receiving free dinners at our Big Wednesday night program or from coming at all, really. These neighborhood people have been labeled (by some) as “Dave Kerr’s People,” as though a pastor offering hope and a free meal to people in need was something preposterous (he associates himself with sinners and the mentally ill!). At first I thought that the issue was pure classism, but I think that today I changed my mind. It’s not just about being prejudiced against people of another socioeconomic status, its the inability to understand what it is like to trust oneself to the goodness of a fellow human being.

And that, my friends, seems like a spiritually impoverishing state of affairs.

Preparing for Very Studious Bible Studies…

Well, I’ve been trying to read a “Christian book” for a long time now. I’ve got a few of them, you know, the sort that are supposed to appeal to people like me who ask a lot of questions and experience bouts of skepticism about mainline Christianity, et al. But you know, I haven’t made it through a single one in the last few years, regardless of my resolve to keep turning the pages. I think there is some sort of wall inside me, some bad muscle memory that just turns me off the second I see the words Zondervan or Youth Specialties on the spine. I know I’ll get over it eventually.

It may be possible, however, that I’ve finally met my match. Our summer staff will be reading Donald Miller’s Searching for God Knows What, a book we picked for discussion after a hearty recommendation by Pastor Craig (VERY IMPORTANT EDIT: Pastor Craig could never have made this hearty recommendation without the robust advocation of Pastor Cory, our favourite father-to-be). This afternoon I snagged it from one of the guys and took a quick jaunt through the first chapter. It seems like a pretty cool book so far (which is good, since I’ve ordered eight copies). I’m looking forward to reading this, and more importantly, I’m looking forward to the discussion during our Very Studious Bible Studies. With discussion questions like: “Is Miller demeaning the role of traditions, rituals, and disciplines in his critique of faith formulas? What do you think about these practices?”, how can we go wrong?! Just kidding, guys… but seriously.

acceptible food

I’m pretty well convinced that what we choose to consume in the form of food (and in general) has spiritual implications. That’s why I’ve opted for a primarily plant based diet and buy organic when I can. I’m fascinated, however, by religious groups that have dietary guidelines woven right in with their faith practice. We are hosting a group of eighty Muslims next weekend, so I have been doing a little research on foods that are Halal, which means permitted or lawful for a Muslim to eat. It doesn’t seem like serving them will be too terribly complicated; no pork product (carnivorous and omnivorous animals are haram, unlawful), no blood product, and all meat must be blessed in the name of God. Conveniently, Sysco has their own blessed line.

I think the best part of my job is learning people’s convictions about food and figuring out how to feed them. I love that people think about what they are eating, even if it means I have to dream up and prepare an entirely separate dish (special diets have become my domain). It’s just the right thing.

the madness of ministry

I’m pretty sure that the basic chronology of my life since sometime around middle school can be broken down in time periods of being being involved in ministries and attempting to recover from them. A seemingly endless cycle of giving, burnout, and antidepressants. And I just don’t really know why.

I’ve gone through different stages of guilt, blame, bewilderment, grief, anger, and most other emotions at least fourteen times. I’m still going through them. I’m still trying to figure out how ten weeks last summer managed to put me in a more paralyzing depression than I have experience since highschool. I’m still trying to forgive, forget, and crawl out of the deep, dark hole. Please don’t think this is a “bash the church” or “bash Calvin Crest” type of post. It isn’t. This is me trying to make sense of my life and a phenomenon that I see over and over in people I know and love.

Why does ministry suck so much? Why do some Christian organizations treat their employees so poorly? This summer I heard several people agree that they had been treated far better in their “secular” work places than they were being treated by the particular Christian organization we were all working for. How is that possible? Why is that possible? It doesn’t make sense. It shouldn’t be, but it is over and over again.

And here I am, on board to help and grow a new ministry in a new place. Sometimes I can’t help but think I’m only creating a new monster, even if I do get paid overtime. Is this place going to be one that facilitates health and wholeness or will it be one that simply devours people’s energies and then moves on? Will this be a ministry that leaves people in pieces or one that builds them up? Our little organization is as dysfunctional as the next, but are we moving towards wholeness or are we moving away from it?

These are the questions I’m always asking…

Every time you point the finger…

Last night we were hanging out with our new boss, Rick Harrison, and his family. Somewhere along the course of conversation we started talking about college, at which point he dropped the statistic that I think is probably every pastor’s worst nightmare. That is, that out of all the kids who say they are “born again Christians” (and I’m not sure exactly what that would mean) when they are seniors in highschool, only ten percent will have the same conviction after their freshman year of college. It isn’t the first time I’ve heard numbers like that. Nearly everybody I know in ministry is all up in a tizzy (well, they’re at least mildly chagrined) because they reality is that the church just isn’t retaining young members like they want to. I think I even read about it in the Economist.